Training a human is no joke; especially in the realms that we as adults take for granted such as going to sleep. So in the beginning as a newborn, he slept all the time and yet i was always so exhausted and tired. Now at 4 1/2 months, it's like " Gabe i thought we went thru this rodeo already!?", but i had to learn we really hadn't. At that young age they just fall asleep from their milk drunkenness and you salvage whatever time that you have left over to gain your sanity back. Now, he is a whole different baby; wanting to explore and talk to me more i should have known that the ride was far from over. So trying to draw on my own experience, i realized quickly this is going to be alot harder than i thought. As an adult, it's simple, your tired you go lay down and viola! But how do you teach someone and then how do you give them good habits of going to sleep so it becomes a normality...then do all this when only one of you speaks an actual language. So i decide, off to the internet i go to research what the "professionals" say. Dare i say that i probably only confused myself more.
To cry or not to cry; that is the question! Some people say let them cry themselves to sleep while others call you a monster for even thinking the thought. Needless to say after reading and reading, i needed the nap now, not Gabe! That's when it dawned on me, that i guess there is no right way to do this; which means &*%$ , i'm on my own..lol. So i figured it was time to experiment to see what me and his temperament was and we'd go the gentle route first.
Soothing and rocking, soothing and rocking..ugh it would take me forever to get him to sleep and then as soon as i put him down all hell would break loose. I then came face to face with the hard truth, he is just gonna have to cry and there is no gettin around that. But i wanted to make sure that his tears and mine were constructive in reaching our goal; a good night’s sleep.
Combining a little of the soothing and the crying it out method, my little boy was going to get the best of both worlds. I started with the naps first, being that it has been proven to me..good naps means good sleep!; perfect time to tackle the beast. Singing his favorite song "Twinkle Twinkle" this was to be our signal to say, Hey you it's sleep time! Then the big moment, the put down....needless to say he screamed bloody murder as if i had betrayed him and broken his heart. I patted his chest and fought back the tears and just reminded myself in my head that this was only temporary and this pain was going to help us all. I quickly left the room clutching the baby monitor, just to sulk in the chair two rooms away to watch the clock. Only 3 mins i said to myself, 3 mins and i can go and calm him down; every cry i can just translate it as "mommy!! why have you abandon me? Come get me!!"...two mins left. I started to countdown to the 3 min mark, and as soon as the clock would allow i ran to his room just to sooth him, but without picking him up. One min of kisses and hair strokes later, it was time for my departure, this time for 5 mins. I assumed my position back in my chair for what i thought for sure would be the continuation of my torture. Yet again i watched the clock as 1 min, then 2 mins, finally 3 mins passed, only to remind myself that i had 2 more to go this round. Holding on to the baby monitor much to my surprise, a few little whimpers then silence...Silence?, i rushed to his room (quietly of course :0) and there he was, hands over his head and peacefully asleep. We Did it!!
A few days later we have now incorporated this little method into our naps and now at night. And i am proud to say it only takes 3 mins for him to get to sleep and every day it gets shorter and shorter. The crying doesn't get any less hard to hear, but to me i now interpret it as " mommy i love you and i want to be held, but i'm tired and when i wake up i'm expecting tons of kisses". And tons of kisses you shall have my sweet sleeping prince!
I share this story because i know there are other moms who have either gone through this or going through it now, and i just want you women to know you are not alone! You are not a monster because your child crys, you are teaching your child early..that sometimes we must go through things we don't like to get a result we need...and i'd say we both learned that..
Until next time!
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